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- Homer: You guys don't have a gay time machine, do you?
- Julio: Yes. It's called Grady's shoe closet.
- Grady: Hey, Julio? Ouch.
- Lenny: Ow! My eye! I'm not supposed to get jigs in it!
- Homer: Marge, I can't live like this, I'm tired of walking around on eggshells!
- Marge: Maybe if you didn't throw them on the floor… (gestures towards eggshells that Homer is standing on)
- Homer: Now you're just making up rules! Who made you Judge Judy and executioner?
- Nelson: Ha ha! Bart's so poor he has to eat cardboard!
- Milhouse: What are you eating?
- Nelson: Dry wall.