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The Harpooned Heart

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The Harpooned Heart Book

The book itself

The Harpooned Heart
is a romantic 286 pages book written by Marge Simpson.

The book has been made into a spoken form. Marge also began to write a sequel for the book, "The Harpooned Heart II: Thunder Down Under", but after the critical failure of the first one, she abandoned the notion.


Temperance Barrows lives on Nantucket with her two children and husband Captain Mordecai Barrows who is a crude, rude, perverted drunken brute. When he returns from his month whaling trip he only catches a seagull and leaves to go to a bar. While Temperance does the laundry she meets Cyrus Manley who is new to the island. The two become very good friends and eventually, lovers. When Mordecai finds out he corners Cyrus on top of a cliff with a harpoon. When Cyrus says that Temperance is pregnant with his child, Mordecai throws his harpoon, impaling Cyrus on a whale that Temperance had admired from a distance. However, the harpoon's rope becomes wrapped around Mordecai's leg, dragging him under the sea to die with his enemy. Temperance then realizes its the end.


Temperance Barrow was based on Marge. In fact, Marge was confused by her similarity to the character that she failed to notice that three of her paragraphs replaced "Temparance" with "Marge", as Otto noted.

Captain Morticai was based on Homer. Originally, Captain Morticai was depicted as a caring loving and successful whaler, but she realises how slobbish and uncaring Homer is, she rewrote the character of Captain Morticai to resemble Homer as he was: a selfish slob.

Cyrus Manley was based on Ned Flanders after he gave Marge a free Stud Detector, which he brought for extra.

Temperance's two mainly-focused children, Bartelby and Lisakaiah, are undoubtedly based on Bart and Lisa.

Though none of the details of the book's plot are disclosed other than a handful of scenes as well as the ending, there is a high chance that there are other characters in the book, all of which have been undoubtedly based on the townspeople of Springfield.


Chapter 1, starts and beginningsEdit

Swim, swim, swim, thought the whale, flapping his flappers.

Thank you'sEdit

Mayor Quimby, Disco Stu, and our fighting men and women overseas.

There once was a girl from Nantucket. Her name was Temperance Barrows. And her heart was heavy with feeling. Temperance was trapped in a loveless marriage.

Temperance Barrows stared at the sea, like a dog stares at a ham.

For Temperance, the days passed on, as did seven of her 10 children.

Temperance had to face the unhappy truth. She had married a brute.

Temperance was doing the laundry.

Captain Mordecai stared at the shop window full of powdered blow holes. Mmm! Blow holes, he drooled.

The brutish Captain Mordecai has cornered his rival, Cyrus

As Temperance watched the two men she had loved and the one whale she admired disappear into the ocean, she realized it was the end.


  • Temperance BarrowTemperance Barrows - The main character, who is trapped between two men: her husband, who she doesn't love and Cyrus that is new in Nantucket. She has a pink dress and bonnet that covers her tall blue hair. In the end of the book she becomes pregnant with Cyrus's child.
  • Captain MorticaiCaptain Mordecai Barrows - A very slobbish and uncaring character who is Temperance's husband. He is a whaler and often spends his time at a bar. He is killed when a rope wraps around his ankle after murdering Cyrus. He believed after Cyrus died that he could take advantage of Temperance. He wears a sailor's hat that with gray hair and a gray outfit.
  • Cyrus ManleyCyrus Manley - A muscular character that is Temperance's love interest. He is new to Nantucket and he dies when he is impaled by a harpoon thrown by Mordecai, after finding out he is the father of Temperance's unborn child. He has long brown hair and a moustache.
  • Bartabe Barrows realBartabe Barrows - One of Temperance and Mordecai's children. Bartabe is the only son of Temperance and Mordecai. He wears a blue outfit and is Temperance and Mordecai's eldest child.
  • Bartabe BarrowsLisakaiah Barrows - The youngest child of Temperance and Mordecai after the eight youngest children die, due to sickness and lack of food after tagging along with Mordecai in his whaling voyage. She wears a purple dress and becomes the middle child after Temperance and Cyrus's child is born.
  • Moab'sMoab - He has a bar called "Moab's", that Captain Mordecai often goes to.
  • Numerous other characters that haven't been revealed


The book was acclaimed by the townspeople of Springfield and several book publishers and was a hit, though book critics criticized and panned the book and as a result, it became unsuccessful.


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