The Falcon and the D'ohman is the first episode of Season 23. It revealed the fate of Nedna, which was left to a viewer's online poll after the last episode of Season 22.
Homer meets a new security guard, Wayne, at the nuclear power plant, who is a former CIA operative. Unfortunately, Wayne gets fired for attacking Mr. Burns while a group of Ukrainian mafia members are on route to Springfield to kill Wayne. Later, Homer is kidnapped and Wayne must leap into action to make a rescue.
The episode begins with Jeffery Albertson in a room with large quantities of Simpsons memorabilia. He announces that this episode will reveal the fate of Nedna, but that it will be carefully hidden within the episode. He then 'starts' the episode with his computer, which opens showing Homer arriving at the power plant. He is singing a song in the tune of the Police's Walking on the Moon (Sneaking in at Noon). Homer finds out the plant has hired a new security guard named Wayne Slater, who has replaced Larry.
Meanwhile, while making crackers for Bart and Lisa, Marge daydreams she has become a contestant on the cooking show Master Chef. She wins and the host, Tom Colicchio, turns into a kitchen. When Marge stops daydreaming and gives the crackers to Bart and Lisa, however, they don't like them, much to Marge's disappointment. Later, Slater is walking home in the rain. Homer, who is in a car, offers him a lift and to join Homer at Moe's Tavern for a beer. Wayne refuses at first, but eventually chooses to get in the car when it starts hailing, telling Homer he seems like a nice gentleman, and he will have one drink with him, but nothing else. While Wayne is in the bathroom at Moe's, Snake rushes through the door on his motorcycle to stage a heist. As soon as Wayne comes out, he skillfully beats up Snake and prevents the robbery. The story spreads quickly and a news segment that features an interview with Wayne with Kent Brockman and an animated Taiwanese dramatization of the incident at the tavern soon airs on television. It is discovered that Wayne was once a highly-trained CIA agent, who was taking shelter in Springfield after killing a Ukrainian mobster's wife. Throughout the episode Wayne suffers from recurring flashbacks from his previous missions, triggered by trivial and unpredictable events, as evidenced when he attacks Mr. Burns, resulting in Wayne getting fired.
Homer permits Wayne to stay in Bart's treehouse. Wayne talks in his sleep about a past mission, causing couples in the nearby houses to lose sleep. Ned and Edna are one of these couples, and they are shown holding each other in bed, revealing that 'Nedna' will remain a couple. Unfortunately, news of what happened to Burns is leaked onto YouTube and viewed by the mobster, named Viktor, in Kiev. The gangster and his henchmen travel to Springfield, abduct and torture Homer when they find out that Homer is Wayne's friend. Wayne tracks Homer (who had unknowingly eaten a tracking chip), rescues him and turns the tables on all the gangsters. Afterwards, Wayne plans to leave Springfield, but not before giving Homer the 'fist pound' Homer wanted when they first met at the power plant. However, Marge suggests Wayne get a job working alongside Patty and Selma at the Springfield DMV, to which he agrees. At the DMV one day, when Sideshow Mel requests that his spot be held while he fetches paperwork, Wayne (whose flashbacks are triggered yet again) grabs him and states that no one held his spot when he was a prisoner in North Korea and forced to write a ridiculous musical play paying tribute to Kim Jong-il while having a car battery hooked up to his nipples.
During the closing credits of the episode, Ned and Edna thank the fans for voting for their relationship to continue. Principal Skinner then cuts in to ask why he wasn't given a second chance with Edna. Then Agnes belittles him for planning to compete against the couple when the polls are closed and predicts that she will never have any grandchildren.