|The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson||
- (After Homer destroys the car boot)
- Homer: Hehe, Homer one. New York nothin'. (Steps on destroyed car boot) D'oh!
- Bart: That took too long. How come we had to transfer in Atlanta twice?
- Lisa: I just say we should have paid the extra $1.50 and got a bus with restrooms!
- Marge: We'll meet you in Central Park at 5:00.
- Homer: Okay, but not a minute later. Once the sun goes down, all the weirdos turn crazy. (looks at person on street) I'm on to you!
- Marge: I don't think it's a good idea to be driving around in a car you built yourself.
- Homer: (Building a car out of a mattress) Okay, Marge, either you can stand there and complain, or you can get started knitting me those seatbelts.
- Homer: New York is a hellhole. And you know how I feel about hellholes.
- Barney: I can't drink. I'm the designated driver.
- Duffman: Ah, that's swell. Duff Beer wholeheartedly supports the designated driver system. Now, who wants to party?!
- Homer: Awright New York, I'm comin' back! But you're not gettin' this! (throws his wallet into the fireplace)
- Lisa: Dad, our baby pictures were in there!
- Homer: Don't you start!
- Bart: Hey, immigrants! Beat it! Country's full!
- Sailor: OK people, you heard the lady. Back into the hold. We'll try Canada.
- Lisa: Mom, are those rabbits dead?
- Marge: No, no, Lisa they're just sleeping, upside down…and inside out.
- Lisa: Here's a better idea. You give me your address and I'll write to you.
- Bum: OK. Send it to Jesus, uh, care of the Pentagon.
- (Homer looks at the letter saying that he has to go to New York and gasps)
- Homer: '''DO'H! (Camera zooms out as the do'h echos)
- Lisa (reading the letter from New York): Dear motorist, your vehicle is illegally parked in the burrough of Manhattan.
- Homer: My vehicle!
- Lisa: If you do not remedy this malparkage within 72 hours, your car will be thrown into the East River at your expense.
- Lisa: Dad, you can't judge a place you've never been to.
- Bart: Yeah, that's what people do in Russia.
- Homer: Now remember, criminals prey on small town folk like us. So if anybody asks, we're sophisticated millionaires from the Ozarks.
- Marge: Homer, you're scaring the children.
- Fireworks Store Owner (after Bart sets off some fireworks): Oh, no! Chinese fire drill! Serious this time!
- [While watching the "Kickin' It" musical]
- Bart: When I grow up, I want to be in the Betty Ford Center.
- Marge: You better start saving now. It's very expensive.
- Lisa: [shushes Marge] They're strapping down Liza Minelli.
- Taxi Driver (to Homer when he's driving his car with the boot on): Get off the road, you freakin' maniac!
- Bicyclist: (being dragged by taxi driver) Yeah, you jackass!
- Homer: Shut up, Shut up, SHUT UP!
- Marge (to Homer): Of course you'll have a bad impression of New York if you only focus on the pimps and the C.H.U.D.'s.
|◄ Season 8||Season 9 Quotes||Season 10 ►|
|The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson • The Principal and the Pauper • Lisa's Sax • Treehouse of Horror VIII • The Cartridge Family • Bart Star • The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons • Lisa the Skeptic • Realty Bites • Miracle on Evergreen Terrace • All Singing, All Dancing • Bart Carny • The Joy of Sect • Das Bus • The Last Temptation of Krust • Dumbbell Indemnity • Lisa the Simpson • This Little Wiggy • Simpson Tide • The Trouble with Trillions • Girly Edition • Trash of the Titans • King of the Hill • Lost Our Lisa • Natural Born Kissers|