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ā—„ Blood Feud
Stark Raving Dad
Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington ā–ŗ
Doctor: Mrs. Simpson, I'm sorry, but your husband suffers from a persecution complex, extreme paranoia, and bladder hostility.
Marge: Doctor, if you just talk to him for five minutes without mentioning our son, Bart, you'd see how sane he is.
Doctor: You mean there really is a Bart?! Good Lord!

"Michael Jackson": Bart, are you not concerned that Lisa is upset? When I was growing up and did not have a lot of money, do you know what I did when one of my sisters' birthdays came up?
Bart: You stiffed them?
"Michael Jackson": No! I wrote them a song.
Bart holds up a cover of Michael Jackson's Thriller to show that Michael Jackson is black
Bart: Hello, Looney Tunes, this is Michael Jackson! Can you see the difference?
"Michael Jackson": Bart, either Michael Jackson is in a recording studio in Los Angeles or he is right here in your house offering to help you. It is up to you as to what you believe.

At the mental hospital, Homer is among a circle of patients gathered to explain their cases.
Dave: I used to work as a VP in an insurance company, but then one morning when I woke up, I couldn't leave the house.
Homer: Was the door locked?
Dave: No, I just couldn't face what was out there.
Homer: Was it raining?
Nurse: No, Homer. Dave suffers from agoraphobia: a fear of open areas and crowds. Please, Dave go on.
Dave: Anyway, I knew I just couldn't take that drive to work.
Homer: Were you out of gas?
Everyone stares at him.
Homer: (scoffs) Baby.

Homer calls home from mental institution.
Bart: Joe's Taxidermy. You snuff 'em, we stuff 'em.
Homer: Boy, when I get home, I'm gonna wrap my hands around your neck and...
People look at Homer.
Homer: ...Smother you with kisses.
Bart: Homer, whatever they've got you on, cut the dose.
ā—„ Season 2 Season 3 Quotes Season 4 ā–ŗ
Stark Raving Dad ā€¢ Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington ā€¢ When Flanders Failed ā€¢ Bart the Murderer ā€¢ Homer Defined ā€¢ Like Father, Like Clown ā€¢ Treehouse of Horror II ā€¢ Lisa's Pony ā€¢ Saturdays of Thunder ā€¢ Flaming Moe's ā€¢ Burns Verkaufen der Kraftwerk ā€¢ I Married Marge ā€¢ Radio Bart ā€¢ Lisa the Greek ā€¢ Homer Alone ā€¢ Bart the Lover ā€¢ Homer at the Bat ā€¢ Separate Vocations ā€¢ Dog of Death ā€¢ Colonel Homer ā€¢ Black Widower ā€¢ The Otto Show ā€¢ Bart's Friend Falls in Love ā€¢ Brother, Can You Spare Two Dimes?
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