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- Gil: Don't worry reverend, according to your policy your church is covered for everything but acts of God.
- Reverend Lovejoy: But we believe everything that happens everywhere is an act of God.
- Gil: Then by jiminy, you're right! We're off the hook! Those Cornell men at the head office are gonna be doing the Salukis strut tonight. Go southern Illinois!
- Gil, Homer, and Bart: (In unison) Salukis strut!
- Bart: God doesn't hear my prayers. If he did, I'd be at home on the couch playing video games. In a diaper.
- Helen Lovejoy: Is that a woman's voice? Send her in!
- (Marge heaves)