- Bart: I gotta have those candy bars.
- Lisa: But Bart, we don't have any money.
- Bart: There's gotta be a way.
- Lisa: You better not be thinking about stealing those candy bars.
- Bart: That's it!
- Lisa: Better not, Bart!
- Bart: [stuffs candy bars into his pants] So long, suckers! [gets caught by the security guard] They got me!
- Security Guard: You just sit right there and think about your crime you dirty little shoplifter thief.
- Bart: Yes. [sticks tongue out as the security guard leaves]
- Security Guard: I think I got this kid so scared he can't even see straight. [at one point his eyes "pops" out to look like a derp]
- Bart: I know my right. You can't home me; you ain't got no evidence, coper. [looks in mirror, with hands and mouth covered in chocolate. gulps] Uh, is it too late to make a full confession?
- Marge: What did you learn from this experience, Bart?
- Bart: Well, Mom, I might have been caught and had a few bad moments there, but I gotta admit, the chocolate was delish.
- Bart: That's not true, mom. I got a free ride home, didn't I? [cut to the car. the car stops and Bart is booted off the car. the car drives away]
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