My Mother the Carjacker/Quotes
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- Mona: "Granny to the man, Granny to the man"
- Chief Wiggum (reading Hippie-English dictionary): "This is the man here. I think it'd be a gas if you turn that magic bus around and keep on truckin' down to our pit pad."
- Mona: "I don't know what you're saying, but I am not turning back."
- Grampa: Mona, I'll always remember raspberry trolley cars because my mind is shot.
- Moe (to Mona): Mrs. Simpson, when you took off, you left a hole in Homer's heart that he's been trying to fill with alcohol for 20 years. God bless ya!
- Bart: This bridge smells like urine.
- Homer: They all do.
- Bart: Fresh urine.
- Homer: Hey, the bathroom's a block away. (zips up)
- Bart: Mom made the Oops Patrol! Hot damn!
- Homer: Bart, you're not at school. Don't swear!
- Female Prisoner: I hope this bus ride never ends! Because I'm getting executed when I get off.
- Homer: Okay, "Drought Threatens To Turn West Into Dessert"! Yum yum! I think I'd like some whipped cream on my Wyoming!
- Lisa: Dad. The word's desert and those farmers are suffering!
- Homer: From what? Too much hot fudge? Hah! Yee Hee! Come on, Bart show me some love.
- Bart: Don't drag me down with you, old man.
- Kent Brockman (about Mona): During her years on the lam, Simpson lead an exemplary life working as a crossing guard, oral historian, reader for the blind, listener for the deaf, and reacher for the short. Yet local villain Montgomery Burns seen here terrorizing children in a nineteenth century wood-cut insists that she stand trial.
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