Moe: Groundskeeper Willie … you know, the guy in the skirt? Bought himself a mail-order bride. But he's too cheap to pay the C. O. D., right? So she's still in a crate down at the post office. Wanna go look-see?
Homer: It's true. I'm always making clever noises, and she never chuckles at 'em.
Lisa: I can't believe you did this,dad. Why didn't you put that thing in your room?
Homer: Hmm, that thought never occurred to me. Funny how your mind works in a crisis.
Homer: Ah no. No freezing.
Owner: No, Mr. Simpson. This is a sensory deprivation tank. It blocks out all the external distractions that bombard our souls.
Homer: Can you pee in it?
Lisa: I'll take two hours!
Homer: Me too.
Owner: You're about to take a journey into the mind. You may see and experience things that are strange and frightening. But remember, they can't physically harm you, though they may destroy you mentally.
Lisa: Dad, I still don't understand how you could just give my room away.
Homer: Honey, what's your favorite movie?
Lisa: Well, until you taped over it, "The Little Mermaid".
Homer: That's right. "The Odd Couple". Meet your new, comically mismatched roommate- Bart.