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I've been scorched by Krusty before. I got a rapid heartbeat from his Krusty Brand vitamins; my Krusty Calculator didn't have a 7 or an 8; and Krusty's autobiography was self-serving with many glaring omissions; but this time, he's gone too far!
Bart Simpson

Krusty's primary source of income is the almost neverending amount of merchandise he puts his name and face to. Unfortunately, Krusty's love of money and gambling problems means he endorses absolutely anything suggested to him regardless of quality, and brands it with his seal of approval without even looking at it before doing so. As a result, the Krusty brand has become a dumping ground for products from inept companies that know a celebrity endorsement is their only hope for selling their product, and sometimes even malicious companies wishing to harm or exploit children. It has gotten to the stage where he can't endorse any more merchandise because there is nothing left that he hasn't already endorsed.

Nearly all Krusty brand products have major defects ranging from poisonous to explosive. Many of his food products are imitation and don't contain actual food. Several of his talking dolls catchphrases contain legal phrases preventing him from being sued as a result of a toy related accident.

  • Absolut Krusty (vodka)
  • Krusty Brand Seal of Approval (on everything that meets the "high standards" of Krusty the Clown)
  • Krusty the Clown Show
  • Krusty's Prime Time Circus of Ratings Special
  • Krusty Handguns
  • Krusty-Brand Home Pregnancy Test ("May cause birth defects")
  • Krusty-Brand Cereal (aka "Krusty-O's")
  • Krusty-Brand Imitation Gruel (9 out of 10 orphans can't tell the difference)
  • Krusty Charms
  • Frosted Krusty Flakes
  • Extra-Frosted Krusty Flakes
  • Escape From Krusty Island
  • Krusty-Brand Wrist Watch ( "leaks acid onto everything")
  • Chocolate Frosted Frosty Krusty Flakes ("Only sugar has more sugar!")
  • Extra-Frosted Chocolate-Covered Krusty Flakes
  • Krusty-Brand Lo-Cal TV Dinner
  • Krusty's Famous Sauce
  • Krusty-Brand Low Income Housing
  • Krusty Burger (hamburger and fast food establishment)
  • Kamp Krusty ("The Krustiest place on earth!")
  • Krusty's Klown Kollege
  • Krustyland Amusement Park (Featuring: The Remarkable Leaky Tugboat, Cactus Patch and the Never-Ending Line.)
  • Euro Krusty Land (Later blew up)
  • Mount Splashmore
  • Krusty's Non-Narkotik Kough Syrup
  • Krusty Brain & Health Tonic
  • Krusty-Brand Vitamins
  • Krusty Brand Bite-A-Min's Imitation Vitamins
  • Krusty Doll (variant also produced)
  • Krusty the Klown Alarm Klock (Gets extremely hot when plugged in)
  • Krusty Calculator
  • Krusty Phone
  • Krusty Wallclock
  • Krusty Bedside Lamp
  • Krusty Pencil Tops
  • Krusty Lunchboxes
  • Krusty imitation Gum (Contains spider eggs and a deadly virus. Krusty charges for the antidote.)
  • Krusty juice box (Contains absolutely no fruit juice)
  • Krusty Giant Toy Drum
  • Krusty's Sulfuric Acid
  • Krusty Trash Basket
  • Krusty T-Shirts
  • Krusty Posters
  • Krusty Non-Toxic Kologne
  • Krusty's Autobiography (Ghostwritten by John Updike)
  • Krusty's Crowd Control Barrier "Krusty Sez 'Get Back'"
  • Krusty Slippers
  • Lady Krusty Mustache Removal
  • Krusty Electric Toothbrush
  • Krusty Mini-Basketball Hoops
  • Krusty Knife Doll
  • Krusty Eye wash
  • Krusty Brand Geiger Counter (Shown in Fat Man and Little Boy, when Homer builds a small nuclear reactor. Lisa holds the Krusty Brand Geiger Counter up to it, and the counter promptly says "Whoah! That thing's gonna blow! Drop this toy and run!")
  • Krusty Home Depot (hardware store)
  • Krusty Partially Gelatinated Non-Dairy Gum-Based Beverages (milkshakes)
  • Krusty Personal Swabs
  • Krusty Brand Endorsement Contract
  • Krusty Burger Express (version of Krusty burger but a related business (Simpsons Comics issue 107))
  • Krustaco Hut (Pizza Hut version of Krusty burger but a related business (Simpsons Comics issue 107))
  • P.J. Mackrustydoodles (Mc' Donalds version of Krusty burger but a related business (Simpsons Comics issue 107))
  • Krusty Buns
  • Krusty Mustard
  • Sideshow Marsh-MEL-lows
  • Krusty Soda
  • Krusty the Klown Vinylite Grip Steel Tipped Lawn Darts
  • Krusty greeting cards
  • Krusty Monopoly
  • Krusty Fried Chicken
  • Canyonero (endorsed by Krusty)
  • Krusty's Multi-phastic Personality Test
  • Dr. Krusty Balloon-animal Home Angioplasty Kit
  • Krusty's Vita-Glo Radiant Spring Water
  • Krusty Brand Atomic Particle Accelerator
  • Chef Krusty's Brunch-In-A-Can
  • Krusty's All Purpose Religious Biscuits (They're Kosher Too!)
  • Le Kruste Burgers - The French version of the Krusty Burger
  • The Krusty Brand Fun Factory
  • Krusty Krime Klubber 2000
  • Krusty Steel Marbel
  • Krusty Flakes
  • Krusty's Non-Dairy Non-Ice Cream Whey Product Sandwich
  • My Krusty Pony
  • Krusty Balloon Animal Sculpting Kit
  • Krusty's Kut-Out Klassics DVDs
  • Krusty Bobblehead
  • Krusty Kards "Collect all 10,000. Hurry my bookie's getting ornery!"
  • Krusty Brand Korn Syrup Klusters
  • Krusty Baseball Bat
  • Krusty Bedsheets
  • Krusty Wall Kalendar
  • Krusty Brand Space Probe
  • Krusty the Klown Duvet
  • Krustyburger Laffy Meals
  • Uncle Krusty's Tile, Tub and Tonsil Cleaner
  • Krusty's International Thesaurus 1st & 2nd Editions
  • Kroon Along with Krusty music album
  • Krustylu Studios
  • The country Krustonia
  • Telethon for Motion Sickness Charity
  • Sideshow Mel's Milk 'n' Cookies in a Carton
  • Krusticles
  • Colonel Krusty's Fried Chicken Parts Dinner with Mystery Cobbler
  • Brigadier General Krusty's Salisbury Steak Dinner with Mystery Pudding
  • Raj Krusty's Paneer Dinner with Mystery Biryani
  • Official Krustyland Pencils
  • The Leaning Tower of Krusty
  • Krusty Dogs
  • Super Deluxe Krusty Burger with cheese and extra Krusty Secret Sauce
  • Krusty Secret Sauce
  • KrustyCo Inc. - Krusty's parent company
  • Krusty's Toy, Novelty, and Industrial Surplus Company
  • Huge cardboard City of the Future
  • Little Miss Tinkle Fairytown Fun Set
  • Krusty's Kids Kharity
  • Soy Goy: The Kosher Vegetarian Burger - toppings include avocado & extra sprouts
  • Vegetarian Krusty Midway Meal - with free toy
  • Krusty Seed Company
  • 20 Official Sideshow Mel Used Unicycles
  • Krusty's Famous Sauce
  • Krustyshake
  • Clownion Rings
  • Krusty the Clown's "Secrets of Strength" Muscle-Building Booklets
  • Mr. Teeny's Monkey Bites
  • Krusty's Sugar High Fivettes
  • Sideshow Mel's Fruity Cannon Balls
  • Candy-Coated Krusty Cajun Crawdads
  • Sideshow Bob's Breakfast Options
  • Krusty Kreamy-Os
  • Krusty Kreamy-Os with Triple Stuff
  • Kirk 'N' Krusty Kover the Klassics (magazine or album)
  • Krustofski's Kosher Unleavened Donuts
  • Krusty Brand Chunk Style Tuna - packed in natural tap water
  • Krusty Discount Dashboard Buffet Kit
  • Krusty's Talent Karavan
  • Krusty's Discount Dungeon Depot
  • Krusty Clone at Home Kit
  • The Little Miss Springfield Pageant
  • The Krusty Komedy Klassic
  • Krusty the Clown Walkie Talkies
  • Krusty the Klown Action Figures - Talking Sideshow Mel with Removable Bone, Krusty the Klown with Arthritic Grip and Daredevil Krusty.
  • Krusty Brand Chicken-Flavoured Soda - You'll love the Fowl Taste!
  • Clown Size Shake
  • Cheese Straw
  • Grand Theft Krusty
  • Krustenstein Monster Make-Up
  • Krustyfingers
  • Sideshow Mel bars
  • Krusty Calendar
  • Krusty Brand Baby Oatmeal - now 38% fewer rat droppings.
  • Krusty-Brand Child's Toy Bone - not for use in hair or bone replacement.
  • Krusty-Brand Baby's First Skeleton
  • Krusty's One Hundred and One Uses for a Cherry Bomb Contest
  • Krusty's Kalifornia Experience
  • A Krusty Kinda Kristmas - by IDG
  • Herschel/Krusty's Chocolate Smooches
  • Clown Party Marshmallows
  • EA Mini Krusties
  • The Krusty Bot
  • Krusty's Land of Misfit Toys
  • Krusty EA-Z Bake Pie Oven
  • Krusty Roller Skates
  • Krusty the Clown Studio Set
  • Sideshow Raheem Doll
  • Krusty Brand Firecrakers
  • Krusty's Clone At Home Kit
  • Krusty's Clone B-Gone
  • Larry Snotter and the School for Monsters (endorsed by Krusty)
  • Krustophenia music album
  • Krusty Froot by the Kilometer roll-ups
  • KrustyBrand Better Belive It's Beluga-like Kaviar Substitute
  • K - the Ultimate Krusty the Clown Adults-only Experience
  • Krusty's Kanned Kambrosia
  • Krust-Cicles
  • Krusty's Saltine-esque White Crackers™
  • Krusty Kanned Cheese Product™
  • Krusty Klovnen Baby Visker
  • Krusty-Brand Cough Syrup (the secret ingredient of the Flaming Homer cocktail)
  • Krusty's Choice Oxycontin Candy
  • Krusty's Legal Forms (Hey, Hey! They're Binding!)
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