Give Me Merchandising or Give Me Death!
Jimbo Jones' Wedgie Comics: Rebel Without a Clutch
To Heir I$ Homer
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Jimbo is born to be wild and bad to the bone (in his own mind, at least) when he gets a hold of a dirtbike.

Full Story

Springfield Elementary is offering a dirtbike as the first-place prize for their Arts and Crafts Fair (because they want all the kids to attend and not just the art nerds). Jimbo, Dolph, and Kearney eye up the dirtbike, but are told by Principal Skinner that they will never win it since they don't understand how to express themselves creatively. The bullies decide to retaliate by stealing the dirtbike.

A bit of hot-wiring and pants-pulling later, Jimbo rides the dirtbike through the school to cause some mayhem. He wrecks Martin's toothpick model of the mothership from Battlefield: Earth and gives Martin himself a mobile wedgie, then takes Bart's exhibit of lit firecrackers and throws them into Lisa's Jazz-celebrating cake. Jimbo then rides out of the school and continues to cause mayhem by swiping Homer's Krusty Burger meal and a Squishee from Apu. However, his theft of a donut from Chief Wiggum's hand gets him into a police chase. Jimbo flees to Shelbyville, but his joyride ends as soon as he crosses the city line when the dirtbike runs out of gas, and Wiggum confiscates the dirtbike before driving Jimbo back into Springfield.

Two weeks later, Principal Skinner compliments Jimbo on being a model student and claims that it was his authority that managed to turn the bully around. Jimbo proves otherwise to Dolph and Kearney by demonstrating his knowledge on the table of measurements as he pours sugar into the gas tank of Skinner's car.


Simpsons Comics Stories 1-50
Simpsons Comics
The Amazing Colossal Homer | Bart Simpson's Creepy Crawly Tales: "The Collector" | Cool Hand Bart | Patty & Selma's Ill-Fated Romance: My Sister, My Homewrecker! | The Perplexing Puzzle of the Springfield Puma | Krusty, Agent of K.L.O.W.N. | It's In The Cards The Gnarly Adventures Of Busman | When Bongos Collide! | Be-Bop-A-Lisa | Chief Wiggum's Pre-Code Crime Comics: The End of El Barto | The Greatest D'oh! on Earth | McBain Comics: Dead to the Last Drop | I Shrink, Therefore I'm Small | Edna, Queen of the Congo: Jungle Bungle | The Purple Prose of Springfield | Homer Simpson's Pathetic Pal Barney Gumble: Asleep at the Well | Fan-Tasty Island | Apu Nahasapeemapetilon's Kwik-E-Comics: Apu's Incredible 96 Hour Shift (Without Having a Break) | Fallen Flanders | Homer On The Range: The Kwik-E and the Dead! | Survival of the Fattest | White-Knuckled War Stories: Spare the Rod, Spoil the Grunt! | Give Me Merchandising or Give Me Death! | Jimbo Jones' Wedgie Comics: Rebel Without a Clutch | To Heir I$ Homer | Itchy and Scratchy: This Blood's For You | Bongo Cantankerous Coot Classics: Nostalgia Ain't What it Used to Be | A Trip to Simpsons Mountain| Heinous Funnies: Kill 'Er Up With Regular | Waitresses in the Sky | Itchy and Scratchy: Lead it Bleed | Bumblebee Man in: !Ay, que lastima! | What's the Frequency, Simpson? | KrustyCo Presents: Dartin' Around | Headlight Comics: The Dame and the Clown Get Fatty | Bart's Pal, Milhouse: The Quest for Yaz | Don't Cry for Me, Jebediah! | The Artist Formerly Known as Bart | Stand and Deliverance | Little Big Mart | Bart de Triomphe | Reverend Lovejoy's Hellfire Comics: Citizen Shame! | Send in the Clowns | Li'l Homey: Homey Alone | Marge Attacks! | Itchy and Scratchy 0: Game Called Because of Pain | Get off the Bus!