Thank God It's Doomsday
Home Away from Homer
The Father, the Son and the Holy Guest Star
Homer: (to Ned) You wear a bathing suit in the bathtub?
Flanders: Yeah, so I can't see my own shrinky-dink.
Homer: Makes sense.

Lisa: I feel so much empathy for those villagers. They had to drink their own tears.
Bart: I was so bored, I cut the ponytail off of the guy in front of us. (holds it to the back his head) Look at me, I'm a grad student. I'm 30 years old and made $600 last year.
Marge: Bart! Don't make fun of grad students. They just made a terrible life choice.

Bart: Mom, I don't want to read, it's the weekend.

Bart: I know what we can “Ask Jeeves.” Why does he suck?

Homer: Don't worry, I'll straighten things out with Coach Clay. We're good buddies. We play this game called who can punch the softest and he always lets me win.

Apu: At the same Mr. Flanders are means completely, none it of there. Fort-coming-suit-dreaa.
Homer: Yep, and nobody's telling them. Not even with this good-body, God. (Moe is holding some magazine)
Moe: Boy, not even some sexy still photos and the girly magazine.
Homer: And she listen to it. (starts to laugh and stops) And the best part is stupid Flanders doesn't even know it's happening in his stupid house; hence my nickname, stupid Flanders!

Lisa: You've totally humiliated the best friend The Simpsons ever had.
Homer: You're right, but you know who the real victim is here? Ned.
Lisa: That's what we've been trying to tell you!

Lady: Winner of the Romanian Film Festival's Prestigious Golden Bucket... Holy crap, someone's actually calling!

Flanders: You softcore sophomores took advantage of my trustful nature and sullied the Internet by putting pornography on it! Get out!
(Two hot chicks feel gloomy, they gasps and Ned shocks, too. Springfield citizens cheering together)
Flanders: The whole town is laughing at behind my back! (sighing) I guess you're the only real friend I have.
Moe: Are you kidding? Homer's the one what wised us up to the sexy goings-on.
Flanders: Homer, is this true?
Homer: Ned, I had no choice. It was just so funny.
Flanders: The Bible said: Cast your bread upon the waters! Only I got was, a bunch of soggy breads.
Homer: Hmmm, soggy bre--
Flanders: Don't say it, Homer! This is not the time!
Homer: Ad...

Homer: What's this? (reading) Good-bye, Springfield,
Ned: (voice over) The Flanders family has pulled up stakes. You have laughed at us for the LAST-DIDDLY-AST time!
Homer: Last-diddly-ast? (sobbing) Oh, he's gone! And it's all someone's fault! (He starts to crying, wailing, eating Ned's cookies)
Marge: (on the window) Oh, I almost forget about Ned. (sniffing)

Bart: (while reading "Gay Focus") Mom, am I a butch or a fem?
Marge: (Not listening) Honey, you can be anything you want to be.

Marge: What language is this? Gibby-gabby?
Lisa: It's Albanian. But the producers added subtitles to make it commercial.

Katja: I'm Katja and this is Vicky. We make much study at commissionaire college.
Vicky: We like your about the room, we move that DORY because it's like co-attic. Sometimes we saw the boys in there. (starts to cry) Robes.
Ned: You poor thing, I never heard those Robes. (shudder) Flapping everywhere! Girls, welcome to the very own Ned and breakfast!
Katja: Silly talk means "yes"? (They visited on Flanders' home)
Ned: Here's your room, ladies. You can catch some Z's while you earn those degrees!
Katja: [giggling] You rhyme like Snoopy Dog.
Ned: Well, thank you.

Vicky: Katja? Do you think everyone's watching (She smiles like Britney Spears)
Katja: Yes, they're are. They will see us explore our sexhood.

Bart: Hey, this one of those dirty websites!
Milhouse: Two girls? Who would want that? (The door knocks. Two girls shocks and wearing sleep-ropes, and starts to read)
Katja: You may inside come. (Ned opens and holds some Cappuccinos)
Ned: I got two Cappuccinos for Ned's pre-meds.
Bart and Milhouse: (shocked) FLANDERS?
Ned: (heard his name) That's odd. I guess swore I just heard someone say my name.
Bart: You heard nothing!
Ned: Oh, oh, well, that's better! (Snap to black)
(Fade to Bart and Milhouse still sits on chairs. On a website, Vicky spanks Katja's bottom with Rodd's picture frame)
Katja: Spank me again with little boy's picture! (Two kids laughing while Homer heard something)
Homer: What are you kids laughing it? If you say Jimmy Fallon? I know you're lying. (gasps) Scantily clad co-eds?! Why you little! (starts to strangled Bart) I'll teach you to have a libido!
Bart: (yelling) Dad, look who's in there!
Homer: (shocks) Flanders? (Vicky holds a arrow sign "SEXY", Katja dancing, and Ned brushes his teeth)
Milhouse: He doesn't know it's happening!

(Homer knocks out Coach Roberts)
Roberts: What did you do that? I was backing for mercy!
Homer: I saw my advantage, and I took it. That's what heroes do.

Season 15 Season 16 Quotes Season 17
Treehouse of Horror XVAll's Fair in Oven WarSleeping with the EnemyShe Used to Be My GirlFat Man and Little BoyMidnight RxMommie BeerestHomer and Ned's Hail Mary PassPranksta RapThere's Something About MarryingOn a Clear Day I Can't See My SisterGoo Goo Gai PanMobile HomerThe Seven-Beer SnitchFuture-DramaDon't Fear the RooferThe Heartbroke KidA Star is TornThank God It's DoomsdayHome Away from HomerThe Father, the Son and the Holy Guest Star