The Joy of Sect
Das Bus
The Last Temptation of Krust
(While in the Simpsons' living room, the family are watching this great film...)
God: Noah! They shalt builts thyself an ark, measuring 300 cubits in length!
Troy McClure: (writing on a stone tablet) 300 cubits... give or take.
God: Exactly 300! And thou shalt taketh two of every creature!
Troy McClure: (writing it down) Two creatures.
God: Two of EVERY creature!
Troy McClure: Even stink beetles?
God: ESPECIALLY stink beetles!

Bart: Woah, cool, God is so in your face!
Homer: Yeah, he's my favorite fictional character.

Marge: Oh, it's so late! You kids have to go to bed!
Bart: But the flood is only knee-high! At least let us watch it 'til the midgets drown!

Bart: Food patrol, we're all starved! Let's see what you've got.
Lisa: (holds up three berries)
Bart: That's it? What happened to all the lobsters, mangoes and chewy chewy cocoa beans?
Lisa: All we found were these oozing berries and they look pretty poisonous. (squishes a purple berry)
Ralph: I eated the purple berries...oh (clutches stomach), oh (bends down), aah! (falls over)
Bart: How are they Ralph...good?
Ralph: They taste like (pause) burning.
Bart: Okay, food patrol blew it.
Milhouse: Yeah? Well, your treehouse looks kind of crummy. Kind of really crummy. (gestures to a crudely made treehouse out of twigs.)
Bart: Well, when monsoon season comes, you'll be glad it's there.
(The treehouse collapses)
Bart: Oh, no food, no shelter, no monkey butlers. This island is a death hole. We should have just swam for it like Otto.
(Meanwhile out in the open ocean, Otto is near exhaustion from all the swimming)
Otto: Well, I'm done for. At least I'll leave a beautiful corpse. (sinks beneath water, but is then raised by being caught in a fishing net where he is deposited onto a Chinese-flagged fishing trawler with hundreds of fish)
Otto: Oh, ho! Thank the Good Dude, I'm saved! And we can go back for the kids too!
Fisherman #1: {speaking Cantonese} Do we need another slave laborer in the cannery?
Fisherman #2: {speaking Cantonese} You can never have too many slave laborers.
Otto: I think I am going to like it on this boat!

Sherri: This is all Lisa's fault! She had the idea of that stupid UN club!
Lisa: Hey, Martin stood for the motion. It's entirely his fault!
Nelson: People, people, let's not blame each other. We all know this is Milhouse's fault!

Sherri: I'm so hungry I could eat at Arby's!
Lisa, Nelson, Terri: Oh my gosh!
Nelson: That is hungry.
Lisa: Really hungry!

Principal Skinner: Order! Do you kids want to be like the real UN? Or do you just want to squabble and waste time?

Ned: Maude and I sell religious foot rugs over the internet.
Homer: Internet, eh?
Ned: Yes indeedy, making some good scratch too.
Homer: Scratch, eh?
Ned: Yep!
Homer: Maude, eh?

Homer: (to Bill Gates) Hey, you don't look so rich.
Bill Gates: Don't let the haircut fool you, I'm exceedingly wealthy.

Lisa(licking the slime off of the rock) Savages.

Narrator: So the children learned how to function as a society, and eventually they were rescued by, oh, let's say... Moe.

Nelson: Kill the dorks!
Lewis: Bash their butts!
Sherri: Kick their shins!
Nelson, Martin, Lewis, Wendell, Ralph, Sherri, Terri: Kill the dorks! Bash their butts!
Lisa: Run a-way!

Season 8 Season 9 Quotes Season 10
The City of New York vs. Homer SimpsonThe Principal and the PauperLisa's SaxTreehouse of Horror VIIIThe Cartridge FamilyBart StarThe Two Mrs. NahasapeemapetilonsLisa the SkepticRealty BitesMiracle on Evergreen TerraceAll Singing, All DancingBart CarnyThe Joy of SectDas BusThe Last Temptation of KrustDumbbell IndemnityLisa the SimpsonThis Little WiggySimpson TideThe Trouble with TrillionsGirly EditionTrash of the TitansKing of the HillLost Our LisaNatural Born Kissers