|Coming to Homerica||
- Nurse: We're out of English forms. You'll have to fill in a Norwegian one.
- Marge: Oh! I can't read this sloopy-blooby writing!
- Homer: I do have a history of going up on roofs and ending up in hospitals.
- Marge: Homie, I don't think we should build a fence. Haven't we always taught the children to make friends with those who are a little different?
- Lisa: Yes.
- Bart: Yeah.
- Maggie: Ja!
- (Marge gasps)
- Maggie: Ja! Ja!
- Marge: Maggie's first words are Odgenvillese!
- Homer: Now you see Marge. Now you see why we must build that fence!
- Marge: Build it Homie! Make it as tall as the sky and deeper than Hell!
- Maggie: Ja! Ja!
- Homer: Men, our negative energy has been harnessed to help keep Springfield's borders secure from Ogdenvillians. But first, our group needs a name that evokes America's proud history of citizens rising up to defend our way of life.
- Cletus: The Klan?
- Homer: Well, there are no bad ideas, but let's keep trying.
- Cletus: The Nazis?
- Homer: Okay, you stop trying.
- Homer: I share your xylophobia!
- Lisa: No, Dad, you mean "xenophobia". Xylophobia would be the fear of xylophones.
- Homer: I *am* afraid of xylophones. It's the music you hear when skeletons are dancing!
- Ron Rabinowitz: It turns out the Krustyburger is the most unhealthy fast food item ever.
- Krusty the Clown: Even worse than the Double Krustyburger?
- Ron Rabinowitz: Somehow yes.
- Homer: (eating a Mother Nature Burger) I'm saving the planet! Where's my Nobel Prize?
- Milhouse: Minnesota Vikings apparel? This is Tennessee Titans territory!
- Marge: Look, Maggie. We have a nanny, just like Joe Piscopo and Ethan Hawke left their wives for.
- Marge: You lost your job?
- Homer: It's not my fault! Those barleyjacks filled me up with their liqueurs and liquors, but mostly the liqueurs.
- Kent Brockman: So. you're guaranteeing it's safe to eat Ogdenville barley once more?
- Ogdenville farmer: Well, where there's barley, there's rats, you know? Now, when will you be starting the interview?
- Kent Brockman: That just went out live.
- Ogdenville farmer: Well, then we're screwed.
- Superintendent Chalmers: (weakly) Skinner! If I die, I want you to take over...
- Principal Skinner: (pleasantly surprised) Really?
- Superintendent Chalmers: ...the search committee for a new superintendent.
- Principal Skinner: (shakes head dejectedly) Mmm...
- Superintendent Chalmers: Just hold my head and say soothing things. (lies down with head on Principal Skinner's leg)
- Principal Skinner: Third grade math scores are holding steady. (rubs Superintendent Chalmers' head)
- Superintendent Chalmers: (contentedly) Aah, yes.
- Bart: Dad, are you sure you can put in these new rain gutters all by yourself?
- Homer: Yeah, maybe you're right. I do have a bad history of going up on roofs and waking up in hospitals.
- Bart: Mom says I can have ice cream for breakfast. Oh, she's still here. Mom, can I have ice cream for breakfast?
- Marge: No way, mister! It's just chocolate chip pancakes and syrup for you.