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ā—„ Tales from the Public Domain
Blame it on Lisa
Weekend at Burnsie's ā–ŗ
Bart: (When Homer asks him if he made the phone call) I didn't.
Homer: CHOKE ON YOUR LIES! [grabs Bart by the throat and starts strangling him and grunting]

Homer: Wait, wait, wait, so in August it's cold?
Lisa: That's right.
Homer: And in February, it's hot?
Lisa: Mm-hm.
Homer: So it's opposite land! Crooks chase cops, cats have puppies!
Lisa: No, Dad, it's just the weather.
Homer: So hot snow falls up?

Kidnapper #1: We should make our transfers in a safer place.
Kidnapper #2: It was Homer's idea. (Pulls out photo album with Homer's picture showing.) You say "No" to that face!

Bart: We'll never find Ronaldo.
Woman: (Gasps) Ronaldo?
Homer: Do you know him?
Woman: No no. I was just distracting you while my children rob you.

Homer: Can we stop? I have to go to the bathroom.
Kidnapper: You just went five minutes ago!
Homer: I have a bladder the size of a Brazilnut!
Kidnapper: We just call them nuts here.

Homer: The Simpsons are goin' to Brazil.
Bart: Then I'll have been on every continent.
Lisa: Except Antarctica.
Homer: The Simpsons are goin' to Antarcticaā€¦ next year. This year Brazil.

Ronaldo: I make as much money as Malcolm in the Middle and because I am an orphan, my earnings remain unstolen.

Telemarketer: (while on the phone) Ma'am, would you be interested in changing your long distance service? What the... she hung up on me! What did I do? (Starts sobbing and another telemarketer beside him pats his back).

Lisa: Why must you fight with every utility?
Homer: I told you, I have too much time on my hands!

Homer: (as he sees the alley rats) Oooh! they look like Skittles (he tastes one of the rats).
Homer: (sniffs) Oh, That poor little boy... We've got to find him! How many people live in Brazil?
Lisa: A hundred and fifty-six million.
Homer: D'oh...
Bart: We've got to find him! (the family stares at him) What? I'm really concerned! (they continue to stare at him) Fine! I want to meet monkeys.


ā—„ Season 12 Season 13 Quotes Season 14 ā–ŗ
Treehouse of Horror XII ā€¢ The Parent Rap ā€¢ Homer the Moe ā€¢ A Hunka Hunka Burns in Love ā€¢ The Blunder Years ā€¢ She of Little Faith ā€¢ Brawl in the Family ā€¢ Sweets and Sour Marge ā€¢ Jaws Wired Shut ā€¢ Half-Decent Proposal ā€¢ The Bart Wants What it Wants ā€¢ The Lastest Gun in the West ā€¢ The Old Man and the Key ā€¢ Tales from the Public Domain ā€¢ Blame it on Lisa ā€¢ Weekend at Burnsie's ā€¢ Gump Roast ā€¢ I Am Furious (Yellow) ā€¢ The Sweetest Apu ā€¢ Little Girl in the Big Ten ā€¢ The Frying Game ā€¢ Poppa's Got a Brand New Badge
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