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Bart the Fink/Quotes

< Bart the Fink

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Episode
References
Gags
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Quotes
Credits
Scenes from the Class Struggle in Springfield
Bart the Fink
Lisa the Iconoclast
[The Simpsons each receive $100 in a bequest from Great-Aunt Hortense, who has recently passed away. Marge takes the kids to the bank to deposit their money.]
Marge: You'll feel better knowing your money's in the hands of professionals.
Bank Clerk: [wearing an ape mask] Uk, uk. Are you folks ready to go ape?
Lisa: [protesting] Mom...
Marge: A professional in an ape mask is still a professional.

[In the Cayman Islands, a representative of the Cayman Islands Offshore Holding Corporation has just received a phone call, inquiring about Krusty the Clown's account.]
Representative: I'm sorry. I cannot divulge information about that customer's secret, illegal account.
[The representative hangs up the phone, then does a double take as he realizes what he just did.]
Representative: Oh, crap, I shouldn't have said he was a customer. Oh, crap, I shouldn't have said it was a secret. Oh, crap! I certainly shouldn't have said it was illegal! [sighs resignedly] Oh, it's too hot today.

[Thanks to Bart's alerting the bank about Krusty's Cayman Islands account, Krusty has been arrested. The bank clerk fills Bart in on what's happened.]

Bank Clerk: It turns out Krusty is one of the biggest tax cheats in history, and they nailed him, all thanks to you. Some might say you're a hero, kid. Not me, though. I love Krusty.
[Bart groans.]

(Superintendent Chalmers and Mrs. Skinner walk up to a house.)
Chalmers: I must say I've had a lovely evening, Agnes. I don't suppose I could come in for a cup of...
(Principal Skinner opens the door and turns on the light.)
Mrs. Skinner: (reproachful) Seymour!
Skinner: Mother? (gasps) Superintendent Chalmers!
Chalmers: (grouchily) Skinner!
Skinner: (mumbling to himself, nervously) What I wouldn't give for something to interrupt this awkward moment.
(Krusty flies by bawling.)
Skinner: (smiling) That'll do nicely.

[On the evening news, Kent Brockman reports on Krusty's arrest and Bart's role in it. Bart feels remorseful.]
Bart: Krusty's my hero. How could I do this to him?
Lisa: It is a tragedy for all us kids, but Bart, you can't beat yourself up.
Bart: Yeah. There'll be plenty of people to do that for me at recess tomorrow.


Season 6 Season 7 Quotes Season 8
Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part Two)Radioactive ManHome Sweet Homediddly-Dum-DoodilyBart Sells His SoulLisa the VegetarianTreehouse of Horror VIKing-Size HomerMother SimpsonSideshow Bob's Last GleamingThe Simpsons 138th Episode SpectacularMarge Be Not ProudTeam HomerTwo Bad NeighborsScenes from the Class Struggle in SpringfieldBart the FinkLisa the IconoclastHomer the SmithersThe Day the Violence DiedA Fish Called SelmaBart on the Road22 Short Films About SpringfieldRaging Abe Simpson and His Grumbling Grandson in "The Curse of the Flying Hellfish"Much Apu About NothingHomerpaloozaSummer of 4 Ft. 2

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